Marian Motherhood
It began as Lent broke upon me—Human. That was my word. I didn’t quite understand why, but it’s the word I kept hearing on my heart every time I silenced myself in prayer. Every Lent since I can remember I discover a particular theme that develops through the desert of those forty days, with a lesson to be learned by Eastertide. The word Human, though vague, didn’t fail to become its own lesson; it ushered me into an understanding of my own weakness and dire need for God.
This brought up a certain question within me. A question that changed everything. A question I also invite you to ponder, dears:
In which areas of my life do I lack the freedom God desires for me? What is holding me back from Him? What is an obstacle to silence and prayer? Where do I not feel free?
I sat with these questions a long while, letting them seep into my heart. Over time they revealed the foundation of areas I needed to work on. Areas where I needed healing. Areas I needed sacramental help and God’s abounding grace. It’s partially what brought on my hiatus from instagram, realizing I needed to rid myself of noise to receive more in the quiet moments of daily life as a wife and a mother. I needed to clear my head and really listen.
The lesson of this past Lent was a lesson of God’s love and the shower of graces He pours on those who seek Him with all their hearts and minds, inviting Him into every corner of their life. When we let Him into every part of who we are, every moment of our day, every relationship and work, Christ fills those spaces. He transforms them and elevates them into something poetic and lovely. The space is filled with love.
Something changed within me through this process, moving me interiorly and stretching forth exteriorly. Something spiritual in my soul was pressing itself out into my tangible reality… something almost sacramental. This word Human I saw related to my entire interior freedom. I let go of grasping, of offering prayers of desperation; I let go of old ways, I let go of me, and asked for more of Jesus, putting on a new woman. A woman seeking ever more fully to imitate the quiet humility, gentleness, and stillness of her Mother. The virtue of Mary. A reminder that our fiat—our yes to God—needs to be continually renewed. Our promise to Him perfected, made holier over time.
The world pulls and tugs. It offers an array of colorful distraction, seemingly harmless noise, glitter and shine, attention and seemingly “holy” work, egoism and pride. But the holiest work is the work that no one sees. It grows within each small daily yes to patience and the hidden work fueled by the flaming love of God. It is made possible only by paying attention to it. By seizing the present moment!
Presence is freedom.
The world is loud—Our Lady is quiet. The world points to self—Our Lady points to Christ. The world is critical—Our Lady is gentle. The world offers distraction—Our Lady teaches presence.
And a Mother’s presence means everything to her children.
